Hunting for life

Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion’s starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don’t see that.

It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often, it’s not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it’s always there - fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends.

When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaking suspicion… love actually is all around.

-“Prime Minister”

I must not fear.

Fear is the mind-killer.

Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.

I will face my fear.

I will permit it to pass over me and through me.

And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.

Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.

Only I will remain. 

“This is stupid. i dont know what I’m thinking. I don’t want to be around her. There is no reason to force this. I have no idea why I considered it. Pf. I’m out. Sorry, I should’ve stuck to my guns from the beginning. This is idiocy.”

~ ~

“Yeah, I take full credit, responsibility, call it what you will. I’m obviously an ass for screwing you all this way. You’re right, I shouldn’t have even humored the possibility of doing it and said no outright. I’m an ass. I’m a jerk. I know. I shouldn’t even have even given it a second thought.”

~ ~

“I really, really, really am tired of people trying to get me to participate in things with her. Inviting me to things with her. Encouraging me to take part when she’ll be around. Promising to be a buffer or that it’ll be fine. I’m so sick of it. I’ve made my decision and I’m tired of people trying to change my mind because it interferes with what they want to happen. What their interests are. I’m so done with that. So, so done.”

~ ~

“Yup, my selfishness is creating rifts. I see that. Selfish. But that’s how it’s going to be.”

~ ~

Taken from a txt conversation tonight, where I finally put my foot down.